Seeing Estranged Family At Funeral Reddit. Mar 9, 2024 · I’m feeling anxious about seeing this

Mar 9, 2024 · I’m feeling anxious about seeing this person again and this is only the second funeral I have attended, the first of a close relative. If your presence will help you gain perspective but cause considerable harm to the family, you’ll have to weigh the pros and cons carefully. An estranged family member who I had quite a big falling out with will be there. Also, a funeral is a perfectly acceptable place to not smile. If you're unsure of what to say to the deceased's family, a simple "I'm sorry for your loss" is sufficient. Allow yourself to feel each emotion, from sadness, guilt, loss, anger and remorse; even loving relationships usually hold some regrets! So now, a couple of weeks after the death of my own estranged father, honestly nothing has significantly changed for me. . It appeared to satisfy the family. Especially since they believe they're the victim in the estrangement and tend to spread lies about me. Unfortunately, not all parents have strong A funeral attended by family members who minimise your abuse and/or gaslight your trauma is not helpful to your grieving - be guided by your instincts. You will have done a lot of healing to get to where you are, and will most likely still need to do some more healing as many estranged adult children may never fully ‘recover’. 139 votes, 208 comments. Sep 6, 2010 · Can you enter quietly and in the back, without drawing attention to yourself or the fact that you are there? The logistics of the funeral plan can have an influence on whether or not you go. They are raging against her on Reddit. So accompanying them might be fine, seeing as we all view him more or less the same way. The only way I'd see it as disrespectful would be if you were bad-mouthing the deceased. If you have been estranged from a family member, it is not automatically assumed that you will miss their funeral. Now you could argue that, that was grieve speaking but it's been a few years now and all I've heard is threats directed towards me from my lovely family! I always imagined that one day, we would gather around as older folk under good terms. Reply reply johnjo2770 • Reply reply UnknownCitizen77 •• Reply reply johnjo2770 • Mar 9, 2024 · My relative sadly passed away recently and the funeral will be in a few weeks. My father died last week and I have no regrets not seeing him at the end. Originally, I thought I definitely wouldn't, but it seems the rest of the family will. Parenting is often considered one of the toughest and least recognized roles, but seeing your adult children grow up can make it all worthwhile. I knew going in that I could handle anything short of a screaming fight, and was as neutral and polite as I could be, and otherwise avoided contact. What is the problem? Feb 6, 2023 · Should Siblings Who Are Estranged Be Invited To One Another’s Funeral? A Feb. A very young family member has died and I want to go to her funeral. In my opinion, people don't have a right to see children family members just because they're related. I don't see a problem with you attending a funeral to support your parents. Should they say goodbye? Attend the funeral? Send flowers? How do you handle funerals? BACKGROUND: I've been estranged from my immediate family due to a toxic mother for a few years now. Nov 22, 2023 · Grieving Whatever the decision you make regarding your estranged family member, give yourself permission to grieve before and after they die – just as close family members would. We want closure, but we are not actively grieving him, just the life we could have had if he hadn't been who he was. A community for adult children that are, are thinking about, or were estranged from one or both of their parents. Sep 6, 2010 · What will be gained or lost by your attendance? Think of this in terms of personal growth as well as what the family and friends of the deceased might feel. Now, the question is whether I should attend the funeral. My parents were divorced and not on good terms when my dad passed away. This sub is a safe space and closely moderated. Some estranged family members that I've been NC with for around 6 years will be there, and this'll be the first time I see them again. If you're estranged from your parents, will you go to their funerals when they pass? My parents are in their 80s and I think… Apr 10, 2023 · The illness or death of an estranged family member can be vexing for surviving relatives. On the day of funeral my siblings and BIL literally cornered me and hurled verbal diarrhoea in my face. It is a supportive and engaging community for adults where a conscious decision to estrange from their sibling(s) has been made. A business partner delivered the eulogy, too. We haven’t spoke for a couple of years. What was the relationship like when the person was alive? Feb 10, 2025 · Discover proper funeral etiquette for handling the death of estranged family members. I was included in the obituary, but I'm pretty sure it was just my mother trying to guilt me, as she told my sister to let me know. My mother's younger sister and I were never really close, despite her being my godmother, but our families would vacation together every year and celebrated Christmas as a group. Feb 27, 2018 · I went to a parent's funeral/memorial and stayed several days in a house with my estranged sibling and other siblings from whom I am not estranged. NC = No Contact, LC = Low Contact, VLC = Very Low Contact MembersOnline Dec 10, 2025 · 'Landman' viewers appear to have had enough of Cooper Norris' girlfriend Ariana. I want to be comfortable in my skin, confident and just relaxed within myself. I was estranged from my dad, but after seeing this sub, all I can think of is that one day one of my descendants might be trying to trace our family's roots and get caught on his obituary and be completely baffled as to why they left out three whole kids. If you are considering whether or not to attend, ask yourself these questions: 1. The only family I truly care about is my nephews, and all I can do is continue to keep them in my life and look forward to when they're old enough to drive so that they can come to me and we can start having new, healthy family traditions. I got lucky and there's no funeral. Oct 14, 2011 · I went to an estranged father's (not mine) funeral last year, and the eulogy and conversations afterwards were honest -- the good qualities he did have were mentioned along with his significant flaws. He had no funeral; if my own circumstances had been different, I might have liked to go to a funeral for closure and a sense of final resolution, but things are also fine as they are. They have to demonstrate that they will bring value to the child's life. I have a family event coming up (funeral) and my estranged parent will be thereI don't want to have to deal with them at what is already an emotional time. Learn how to manage complex emotions and decisions with grace and safety. I was wondering if anyone may have some advice about how to get through the day. Nov 21, 2020 · After an illness in the family I realized that I might be seeing her at a family funeral (uncle that I'm not close to but would like to go for cousins) and it got me thinking about how I would handle that. 5th post in the Reddit r/AmItheAsshole sub-forum asks this question. We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. If you’re not comfortable asking the family member in charge of planning the funeral about these issues, phone the funeral director and explain your I can see where you're coming from, however, I've been estranged for probably a decade now (I didn't keep track, but it's been awhile for sure) so it's hardly fresh for me! I'm basing my characterization of my friend's feelings on conversations we've had over the years regarding our childhoods and messages I've gotten from his wife recently. Common reasons for estrangement are abuse, differing expectations about family roles, neglect, clashes based on personalities, or value systems like religion. The decision to attend or not attend the funeralis a personal one and depends on many factors. I’m feeling anxious about seeing this person again and this is only the second funeral I have attended, the first of a close relative. The OP (Original Poster) explains that they are Estrangement is a healthy response to an unhealthy situation. From deathbed visits to funeral services and estranged relationships, here’s a warm, practical etiquette guide for supporting others through grief and loss.

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